How Lady Thatcher’s birthplace became the swinging capital of Britain

A “foam party orgy”, oil wrestling on a bouncy castle and a seminar on erotic massage. All this and more was on offer at Swingathon, Britain’s biggest sex festival, held last weekend[1]. More than 1,000 people turned up for the four-day event, hosted in a field in the quiet village of Allington, on the outskirts of Grantham, the historic market town and birthplace of Margaret Thatcher.

At GBP265 a piece tickets don’t come cheap, but for the more than 1.5 million Brits who identify as swingers, this is their Glastonbury[2], and it’s not to be missed. “Swingathon was so much fun and I was surprised by how up for it everyone was,” says first-time attendee Lana Wolf, a 29-year-old from Dunfermline in Scotland, who went with her boyfriend, Lawrence. “One day we were having breakfast on the grass and right beside us there was a couple having sex. It was really liberating to see so many people fully naked, no matter their age or body type.

Group sex is just fun.”

The four-day festival is hosted in a field in the sleepy village of Allington Credit: Terry Harris

Experts point out that increasing numbers of us appear to agree. “Swinging has definitely become more popular in the past few years and a lot of swinging clubs and festivals take place in the north,” says Prof Chris Hayward, reader in critical masculinity studies at the University of Newcastle. He has been researching the swinging scene since 2018 and was collecting research from a tent at this year’s Swingathon, the fourth edition of the festival. “In 2004 there were about five main clubs across the UK, now there are at least 45 and that doesn’t include private parties and events. They run the gamut from black-tie balls in stately homes to caravan meet-ups off the motorway.”

Swingathon’s particular link to Lincolnshire runs through organiser Matt Cole, who calls Grantham home[3] and was keen to hold the festival at a setting within easy reach of surrounding cities in the Midlands and further north.

Grantham is also renowned for being Margaret Thatcher’s birthplace Credit: Andrew Fox

Hayward says he thinks the famously friendly, socially-inclusive nature of life in such parts of the country have made them a particular hotbed of swinging activity. “I wonder if some of these swingers’ clubs have replaced the more traditional working men’s clubs we used to see in this part of the world,” he says. “The swinging scene is often about midlife people creating a community and making friends and perhaps people are more in need of that in rural areas.” Kerry Voellner, 45, from Manchester, is Swingathon’s other organiser. She has been in the swinging scene “on and off” for 20 years and got involved in the festival in 2023 after Lincolnshire Police tried to take Swingathon to court. “It was a classic case of Nimby-ism[4],” she says. “The police were coming out with ludicrous claims like being worried about children breaking into the festival.

I’d be more worried about children being on the A1 without their parents! And I’ve seen it reported in the media that the village complained about the noise – they’re four and a half miles down the road so they must have better hearing than me.” Voellner and Cole won their case on the basis that they were being discriminated against. “We need to protect safe spaces for alternative lifestyles,” she says. “Being a swinger is a lifestyle choice – we are choosing sexual freedom[5].

Yes, some of it is seedy but different clubs cater to different tastes. Ninety per cent of what I see is just people living their best lives.”

Swingathon organisers Matthew Cole and Kerry Voellner: ‘Being a swinger is a lifestyle’ Credit: SWNS

The term “swinging” was coined in the 1950s, when Air Force pilots in California were said to have instigated a “wife swapping” policy after the war. Changing attitudes to sex, the advent of birth control and the Free Love movement of the “Swinging Sixties” followed, but the idea of suburban parties where men threw their car keys into a bowl is probably a myth.

Although swinging has existed in the UK for decades, the digital revolution has brought the sex party scene to a whole new audience. Apps such as Feeld and AdultFriendFinder help swingers connect, podcasts such as Bed Hoppers offer the lowdown to those new to this lifestyle, and the hashtag “swinging” has 613,000 posts on Instagram. Emma Sayle, a school friend of the Princess of Wales, set up Killing Kittens in 2005.

The company has since raised millions in funding and has hosted high-end sex parties across the world – you can even go on a KK cruise. Meanwhile, Genevieve LeJeune launched Skirt Club, a “female-only play party”, in 2014. It now has a significant membership and a global audience of bisexual and bi-curious women who attend upscale events featuring champagne, nudity and pourable chocolate. “When I started in this industry sex parties were highly taboo,” LeJeune says. “It’s grown on a scale I never imagined.”

Emma Sayle’s company Killing Kittens is just one of many recent enterprises providing high-end sex parties Credit: John Nguyen/JNVisuals

Hayward says that from his research, the average age for a swinger is 45 and 70 per cent of female swingers identify as straight but are bi-curious. “Although people are becoming more accepting of alternative adult lifestyles, it’s interesting that swinging remains so marginalised,” he says. “If I go to the gay quarter in Newcastle there are flags flying and sex is celebrated, but if I go to a swinging club I might struggle to find the entrance.

It’s still very hidden away – there’s an element of secrecy and discretion.” Wolf agrees, saying there is still a stigma attached to her lifestyle, despite its apparent rise in popularity. “People think we’re riddled with STDs but that’s just not the case,” she says. “In fact, to go into the OnlyFest section of Swingathon for porn creators, you needed a certificate saying you were clear of STDs. There are very strict rules about consent.

I feel safer at a swing event than a normal club. And it’s not just about sex – it’s about community.” Hayward says that another of the biggest misunderstandings about the swinging scene is that women are objectified. “There was a swinging club in Edinburgh that didn’t get planning permission as family groups were worried about vulnerable women being abused,” he says. “From my research this is a place where women are in control and they find swinging very empowering.

They decide who, what and when, and men are much more respectful than they would be in a standard club.” Denise Grant, 43, runs SwingBook, an online blog and podcast which is “educating the masses” about adult alternative lifestyles. She and her husband Josh have been going to Swingathon for four years. “It was quite nerve-wracking at first to open up our marriage like that,” she says. “But it’s been amazing for our relationship.

It’s helped us share our feelings and we’ve had to develop high levels of trust.” Grant hopes that swinging will soon shake off its stigmas. “The swing scene now is where the gay scene was 50 years ago,” she says. “Open marriages and ethical non-monogamy should be recognised as valid choices and be free from shame.” There was no danger of being shamed in Lincolnshire last weekend, says Grant.

For now, the UK’s lust for – and acceptance of – swinging might still centre on a field usually reserved for horses, but it is quickly expanding out, up into the north, and beyond, she adds. “Swinging is happening all over the place now.

You just have to look hard enough.”

References

1. ^ Britain’s biggest sex festival, held last weekend (www.telegraph.co.uk)
2. ^ Glastonbury (www.telegraph.co.uk)
3. ^ who calls Grantham home (www.telegraph.co.uk)
4. ^ classic case of Nimby-ism (www.telegraph.co.uk)
5. ^ we are choosing sexual freedom (www.telegraph.co.uk)