A depressingly familiar journey through broken Britain – Liam Thorp
It was a familiar sight, but that didn't stop it being a crushingly depressing one.
As we strolled gingerly towards the platform, the pain of two days of stag party excess weighing heavily on our creaking mid-thirties shoulders, our hazy eyes landed on a vehicle in the distance.
'Is that seriously it?' said one of my beleaguered pals, looking over at the tiny orange and blue train. It was hard to tell whether the moisture slowly departing from his right eye was a teardrop or the remnants of last night's tequila shots. Possibly a combination of both.
He was right to sound desperate.
To call the vehicle stood before us at Nottingham Station a train was to do a massive disservice to the very notion of trains. This was a tin can. A tiny, tin-pot, two-car excuse for a vehicle - but we had no choice.
The five of us glanced at one another, like weary soldiers, steeling ourselves for one last battle. Stepping aboard we were met with that familiar blend of discomfort, panic and perspiration that the rail users in vast swathes of this land now have baked in to most journeys.
I quickly became separated from my stag do comrades (to be honest we had seen enough of each other by this stage) as we raced against the hordes of passengers to try and grab a precious seat. The prospect of two and a half hours of standing after roughly the same amount of sleep was not a palatable one.
I managed to grab one, but quickly realised I had become entombed by the volume of people now stood around me - and this was going to get a whole lot worse before it got any better.
That's because this poxy, sardine can of a rail service was not taking us along a few country roads but through FOUR major UK cities, from Nottingham to Sheffield then on to Manchester and Liverpool.
As we traversed Northern England at a speed that felt slower than erosion and the situation on board became even more bleak, I was hit with an existential gloom about the way huge parts of our country have been shafted when it comes to public transport.
Yes the hangover may have contributed to my sorrow, but the point stands.
There was, however, one moment of joy amid the chaos and despair. A wayward traveller who had ambitiously attempted to make his way to the toilet earlier on the journey and had become marooned away from his group reached out to the rest of the carriage in desperation.
In a show of pure human kindness, those stood along the gangway formed a chain to pass the stranded passenger's tin of gin and tonic to him. As the gleaming, green can of Gordon's passed my sweaty forehead I was reminded of the Churchill quote, 'Failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue the counts.'
Ok so I am being a touch melodramatic, but the situation was ridiculous, infuriating, dangerous and depressingly familiar for anyone who regularly tries to get trains across Northern England. The sight of a miniscule two-car train arriving into a major city full to bursting with passengers, with others trying to cram themselves on board, is not something any of us should have to put up with - and yet we do, all the time.
Add in the fact that we have paid £60-£100 for the privilege and the Kafkaesque nightmare is complete.
For so long those of us unfortunate enough to rely on public transport outside of London have had to put up with a shambolic rail service that combines expensive prices with appalling service levels. I've had enough and I know I'm not the only one.
My twitter rant about my recent experience has been viewed over a million times, with thousands of people sharing their own horror stories of UK rail travel. Nothing gets people angry like the state of public transport in the UK and understandably so.
What made me particularly sad was the number of responses from people saying 'this is why I don't use trains.' What does it say about us as a nation in the midst of a terrifying climate crisis that we are forcing people to use their polluting motor vehicles because of the bedlam on board our rail services?
I would usually go on to say that this is where we need a government to really step in and lead the change for our broken public transport system, but there is about as much chance of that as me being able to get out of my seat and use the toilet during that nightmarish journey.
Instead of looking at ways to revitalise our trains and buses, Rishi Sunak has placed himself firmly 'on the side of motorists' as he looks to shelve policies aimed at lowering emissions and encouraging people to leave their cars at home.
So for now at least, I'm afraid it looks as if we are all going to hell in a handcart. Standing room only of course.
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References
- ^ First picture of woman accused of murdering man she met on Tinder (www.liverpoolecho.co.uk)
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